• Stefan Neff

The Courage To Be Sober Chapter 11

How People Treated Me When I Was Under The Influence Of Drugs And Alcohol

Talking to myself YES, that sounds really weird but I am only half-joking when I say that. I have always talked to my inner child most of my life never getting an answer back of course but sometimes a clue would pop up from time to time, with a strong notion towards clarity of who I am.


This was far and between the normal life, that I have lived. I had people around me that seemed to never tell me the truth about my addictions, and they only wanted to put their blindfolds on for what they thought was the best for me, but that wasn’t what I needed.


The reality was that I needed them to speak the real truth. This is the situation in the world we live in now, that is people are afraid, to tell the truth to the ones they love the most. The pain is high, and the stakes are even higher, but what I needed was for them to tell the truth. I was blinded by the warm comfort of smothering love that wasn’t love, it was a safety blanket that I didn’t need. I was never told you are drinking and smoking your way to the grave of despair

and that your addictions will only bring death and pain to your life. When I was a young teen I looked at life as a dream, not reality.


I lived day to day with nothing to look forward to but the taste of weed and wine from the nectar of the flowers of dandelions. The wine cooler was filled with bottles and bottles of

wine ready for my love of painkillers in my life. Why didn’t I see the truth? I was only focused on myself and the pains that were creating my reality in life. The people around me didn’t know how to deal with the mess I called my own horror show of sorts.


I picked this show, I picked this life, I picked my parents and the people around me. The moment that I realized this, is when I started to face my demons, my fears that were stopping me from my own happiness.


Yes, there were what if’s in my mind throughout my life, but what I found was I needed to take accountability for my life and most of all my problems. I picked the life I have with no exceptions to any rule you may have thought in life, there is no avoiding the life we have chosen. Why is it that some of us think that we have a right to complain about the news, the government and our outcomes? I truly believe that we have made it our own life and it’s time to take it to a whole new level of consciousness in the next fifty years.


I believe that we will stop blaming others and will start on a journey of new heights that will stomp out hatred towards our neighbours. Jealous will be a word of the past, everyone will be talking about personal growth like it was part of our life’s learning.


It will be taught as soon as our child is born and in schools starting in preschool and straight through into higher education. Why is this so important, we are in a stage of evolution of change. The only change in this universe is change itself. It starts with us and we have the power to create the beginning of something very special on this planet, let's not waste the opportunity to make a difference around the world.


Steps Of Change…

1. See ourselves for who we are

2. Stop looking at life as half empty

3. Start taking responsibility for our life

4. Stop blaming others for our problems

5. Be who we want to be

6. Look into the mirror and ask yourself who am I and how am going to

make a difference on this planet

7. Leave our excuses behind

8. Give gratitude every single day

9. Love ourselves

10. Think as if you already have done what you want to achieve


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